It’s 4 A.M. and as usual I’m not feeling sleepy at all… somehow I’ve become much undisciplined lately, in a single word my mum would describe me as “Antihuman”. Anyways a lot of things from past are coming up in my mind, lots of moments of affection, joy and sorrow, maybe it’s because of watching the nail biting ODI b/w India and South Africa all alone. Yes I was missing people, my flatmate wasn’t here all the time and I was cast into some deep thought, so I took up to writing something here.
This time I am thinking what I should write: serious or comic or mixture. But first I should decide about topic: controversial or simple.
No, I should try my hands on some other genre, Story…………yes, well about whom? My own self… no……… I can’t think of a topic, so much have changed in past 6 months that I dread being the central character any more. Ok I got something…
this friend of mine who has won many accolades in literature says that good story is nothing but good observation of what is happening around you. So today I will be putting my observations only.
a) Pure Emotions: When you see children playing, they seem to be very happy. One reason I can think of is that their emotions are pure .If they love, they just love, and they don’t put reasons behind their love. If they hate, they just hate and there is no emotion in between.
They are simple. It is because of selfishness of a child .They sought whole, no division .When their mother takes some other child in her lap, they will cry because they don’t want to share their mother’s love with anyone. This selfishness helps children to decide exactly what they want. Now if one wants to be truly happy should he/she practice this form of selfishness??
b) Small Joys of Life: I remember when as a kid my mother used to give us any fruit(equally divided),then there was always competition who is going to finish last because he will be the one who can enjoy a lot because he can make others jealous by teasing (feeling of triumph). Now we just want to eat as quickly as possible, no joy, no feelings, just eating to end the starvation, to stuff our stomach.
c) Happiness: Today when I get a lot of money to spend on myself, I think of second standard when I had stolen 50 paisa to have an ice cream. My father caught me and gave me one rupee instead. Having ice-cream with that one rupee was worthless, I was the happiest child in universe. Today when you get ice-cream worth hundreds, do you feel anything close to happiness? I doubt it…
d)what can you get from a broken relationship :
1)Some good moments
3)A new way to see the things
4)New goals or opportunities (or you can be back on ur track)
5) A chance to learn value of money ,time and your friends
e)First Love: Remember when in coaching class that girl asked you whether there is a lecture or not . You fumbled and she just smiled back. You remember how happy you were when the teacher declared that you’ve got highest in mathematics test and she looked at you and smiled…did she ??
You remember seeing towards her window with a hope of seeing one glimpse of her. You remember how proud you were feeling when your friends told you “she likes you ek baar bol de yaar“. You remember seeing towards her, hoping she will also look at you. You remember that your friends were asking to “go and propose her” and then you decide to propose her only after getting selected in IIT. You remember the last day of coaching class…how sad she was… was she ??
Now lastly you remember searching her in orkut and sometimes now-a-days in facebook…. you still remember her.. but does she??
f) Helplessness: Waking up in morning, then going to your balcony and watching those kids jumping and chasing each other. Wishing to capture each and every moment of their innocent laughter and suddenly realizing that you have to do some important office work. And then again this new wish to “sit alone on a beach and thinking nothing” capturing our minds.
g) What do we want from our life? Anyone having the answer pleases comment. Someday I would like to meet someone who knows what he wants from his life?